I intended to finish reading The Cosmic Laws of Golf (and everything else) last night. I had begun reading the “application” section last time, and started at a new chapter, “Being the Ball.” With visions of Chevy Chase, I grinned to myself. Five pages into it, the topic became “Birthday Parties, Gifts, Etc.”, which I assumed to be the author’s sense of humor kicking in, and this was the “everything else” referred to in the title. The next heading was “Electronic Devices at Work.” I stopped, and perused the remainder of the book. The page numbers had changed from being at the bottom of the page to the top, and the page header was now Things You Need to be Told. The typeface was a little different, but not a significant change.
Hmmm.
It seems the last 70 pages of my book belong to a text written by the Etiquette Grrls (I guess they’re mad).
Who are they, you ask, to be writing such a book? The Etiquette Grrls are graduates of New England Preparatory Schools and Prestigious Colleges; they are throwers of Great Parties; they can hold their liquor; their expertise on fashion and makeup and-especially Subversive Nail Polish colors-knows no bounds; they wear Doc Martens with their cashmere twin sets; and, most important, they know what they’re talking about.
Not what I really wanted to read. I’m rude, crude, and socially unacceptable, and intend to stay that way.
So I go to the Berkley Books web site to find out how I can contact someone to replace this copy.
We apologize for any errors which occured during the printing process. For severe defects such as missing pages or improper binding, return the book to the store where you purchased it and they will replace the copy.
This does not please me. Yes, it is easier for me than returning the book to the publisher, but now Barnes & Noble has to deal with a problem not of their doing. Why should B&N have to take the hit for shipping a defective book back to New York? No big deal to me. I go to the store on a regular basis.
But I wonder how many copies like mine ended up on bookshelves in stores, and must now be removed, packaged, and returned to Berkley. What is the cost involved, and how much will now go into an increase in book prices? The returned book has no value, so any money spent in its handling is money wasted. Why not simply send me a replacement and eliminate the expense?
Since I can’t email anyone at Berkley, I’ll spend a little time on the phone attempting to talk with someone who can reason and make decisions. What do you think the odds are of doing that through customer service?